What I learned from your cheating man

I suppose this has nothing to do with being a new bride, but on second thought maybe it does. You see, I have knowledge many women do not have. I know why your husband cheats. Now, I know that not all men cheat and when they do it can be for various reasons, but I can only speak from my experience. You were affectionate at first, right? Kisses when he came home, little touches here and there, passionate sex. Then the kids came, the bills came, you are tired, not in the mood, too busy to reach out. He adjusted. He missed the affection, the passion, the love, but he decided it is what it is. Then you began to refuse him altogether. Made him feel like wanting to have sex was wrong, disgusting to you, and he came to realize there was a problem. You went to counseling and admitted to him and the counselor you have no interest in sex and he will just have to accept it. So he did. Then. Well. One day he got an email from a reunion web site that "these people have joined your community" and my name was there. And he remembered me. He smiled with the memories, I was his first love. He sent me a message, I responded. He did not mention you at first, when pressed said you were separated. We emailed, then called. Then one day he said he was coming to visit his family and would love to see me and catch up. The attraction when we saw each other again was intense and undeniable. He was still one of the most gorgeous men I had ever seen and he said I had not changed since he last saw me at age 19. We ended up in a hotel room that night, making love for hours and hours. He wept when he entered me the first time, kept saying how long it had been and how beautiful this was. We became a drug to each other, he healing my wounds, me filling a deep need for affection and sex you had left empty. I guess it was about six months into the relationship I found out you were not separated. By then I was hooked. He was hooked. We clung to each other, the old feelings we had at 15 and 16 still there but magnified by the fact we could now act on the urges, and the desires, we did not understand in our younger years. After time the contact slowed due to other things entering our lives, but we knew the other was there, waiting. All it took was one text call or email and we were right back where we were when it all started. It's over now. Reasons are not important. But here is what I learned. Your husband needs touch, love, affection, laughter, understading, passion, spontanious sex, you to dress up, buy toys to surprise him, soft kisses before he leaves for work, a thank you for something small he did, tell him he is hot, you want him, send him a sexy text out of the blue, but most of all give him the sex he so deeply craves needs and desires to be fulfilled. If you don't, someone else will. I promise.